bringtheruckuss, how to ride out a storm

how to ride out a storm

stock up on inebriants.
stand as close to the window as possible, if you don’t you won’t be able to see all the cool storm shit that’s going on outside.
if there’s a tornado within walking distance go look at it.
check yourself for breast/testicular cancer.
if there’s hail, go find the biggest one and put it in the freezer. don’t wait until it’s stopped hailing, they melt fast.
go steal your neighbors Romney signs.
break into your neighbors house and go through their pill cabinet.
use your imagination instead of porn to masturbate.
look at your phone every 5 seconds to see if you have a signal so you can make a blog post about how terrible everything is.
take a nap so you don’t feel the roof falling on your head and squashing the intestines out of your butt hole.