Posted on 15th Apr at 8:18 PM, with 65 notes
how to be super tumblr famous
- gifs. if you think you can have an original thought you’re wrong, cuntrocket. your personality can be completely expressed with gifs of that wheelchair fuck from glee and fuckin’ michael scott or some shit. gifs. nothing but gifs. FUCK.
- never ever give credit to anyone. if you find it on the internet, or even another tumblr’s blog, it’s fucking yours and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
- post offensive, hurtful bullshit. 100% of people with AIDS are gay? people that cut themselves are just assholes that want attention? hell, it’s just your opinion right? everyone is entitled to an opinion because this is america, right? where we’re free to be as stupid, ignorant, and hurtful as we want. COCK!
- take 50 mg of PCP.
- stare blankly into your laptop and think about murdering your grandmother by choking her to death with her own tits.
- go to the home of topherchris in the early hours of the morning and quietly slip into the room where he is sleeping. while watching him sleep, insert yourself into his dream. notice that he is having a nightmare about the time he went to camp when he was 9 and the counselors ate his parents while making him jumprope topless. it was a tuesday. go to him and say, “i am from the future and i know of thee. you grow up to work for a moderately popular social media site called tumblr where 14 year old girls post pictures of their tits.” exit the dream. notice that his home is covered in empty liquor bottles and razor blades. remove his eyes and replace them with googly eyes. you now can gain 1000 followers at will. notice that there is a small child trapped inside his stomach. use a razor blade to open him up to free the child but realize it is not a child that is being held prisoner inside him, it is a shetland pony. ride the shetland pony to the top of the humor directory where carlovely is waiting to give you a killer blow jay. you are now a kitten made out of marijuana and tits.
- just post stuff you find on reddit.